


Mix Tape

by briony8969



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: But mostly fluff, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Dirk Gently is really enthusiastic about Christmas, First Kiss, M/M, very slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-23
Updated: 2017-12-23
Packaged: 2019-02-18 20:36:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13108077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/briony8969/pseuds/briony8969
Summary: Dirk Gently has always been very into the concept of Christmas but largely without friends with whom to celebrate. This is the first year that that is not the case.





	Mix Tape

Christmas, 1993:

No decorative Christmas lights or sprigs of holly decked the halls of Blackwing’s underground base. Scott Riggins whistled “Good King Wenceslas” as he strode down the hallway, more for his own benefit than anything. All of the subjects’ rooms were well sound-proofed and the hall was achingly silent. No one was around, the maintenance staff in large part having been granted the holiday. Most of the hallway lights were off and the tunnels were lit only by the ever-glowing emergency exit signs. 

Mrs. Riggins was probably going to be pissed at him. Scott wasn’t supposed to be at work today. There weren’t any tests scheduled (merry Christmas, freaks), and he needed to be at the airport to pick up his parents in less than an hour. If there was traffic, his mom would find some way to blame his wife for it.

He just had one little thing to do though.

He stopped in front of one of the numbered, windowless doors and pressed the buzzer. 

“H-hello?” A high-pitched male voice, still a few years off from puberty, addressed him through the speaker.

“Hello Icarus, it’s Riggins, I have something for you. May I come in?” He asked for politeness, but they both knew that Riggins could go where he pleased.

“All right.” Project Icarus answered, and Riggins stepped into the cell, er, room.

Little Icarus, a lanky 11 year old, fidgeted as he looked up at Riggins, trying to hide a well worn children’s edition of “The Night Before Christmas” that he had obviously been flipping through moments before. He had a strikingly large pair of green-blue eyes which took Riggins in with distrust.

“I thought there weren’t going to be any tests today?” He asked in a small voice.

“Nope, not here for tests.” Riggins smiled in what he hoped was a reassuring way, hating how nervous Icarus always seemed with him. It made him feel like a bad guy. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small tupperware container. “I’ve got a present for you.” 

Icarus’s already large eyes widened in as pure an expression of delight as Riggins had ever seen.

“Really?” Icarus asked, hands almost shaking as he reached for it. Riggins hoped that the leftover peppermint brownies from his office party were gonna be worth this reaction. 

“Really really. Merry Christmas, kid!” Riggins said, smiling at Icarus’s euphoric reaction when he peeled the lid off of the slightly squashed chocolate sweets.

“Are all these mine? Or do I have to share them? Actually, I think I will share them, with Marie anyway, I’ll leave them for her for when she comes to tidy up the room. Did you make these? Is there an oven here? Oh but you don’t live here do you? Am I the only one who lives here? I mean other than Moloch of course. I won’t give him any he’d probably choke. Right?” Icarus chattered on in the way that he did. 

“Those are all yours kid. And actually.” Riggins leaned forward and tapped his nose conspiratorially. “Can you just keep this little present between you and me? I’m not supposed to give any project special favors.” 

Icarus pursed his lips and nodded. He knew he was supposed to like when he and Riggins had some kind of secret, but it always sent anxious waves through the pit of his stomach. He wanted to dig into the brownies, or maybe write about them in his journal, they were certainly a change to the usual routine of things. But Riggins seemed to be hanging around as though he expected something. 

Just to get it over with, Icarus threw his arms around Riggins in a, quick, perfunctory hug.

“Thank you Captain Riggins.” He said shortly, stepping away from the man as quickly as he could. 

“Merry Christmas, Svlad.” Riggins said, smiling warmly. Icarus cringed inwardly at the sound of his old name. He wasn’t sure what his real name was, yet, but he felt certain that he’d get there eventually.

“Merry Christmas, sir.” He said, waiting impatiently for his captor to leave.

~*~

Christmas, present day:

For a minute after waking up in Amanda’s guest room, cotton mouthed from too many beers the night before, Todd Brotzman felt disoriented. It was as if this was two years ago and he was still a really second-rate bellhop at a very fancy hotel and Amanda had let him crash at her place or something. The thought of having to drive back to his sad, lonely apartment and go back to his sad, poorly paid job was smothering.

“Todd!” An English, male voice addressed him, slightly muffled through the door. “Todd, are you up?”

With a flood of relief Todd realized it was Dirk. Dirk was real, somehow, and his life was insane, and he had actually killed multiple people at this point, but, praise be, he didn’t have to go to work that day.

“Yeah, Dirk, I’m up.” He mumbled.

“Ok, I’m just letting you know,” Dirk explained through the door, “I’ve barricaded you in this room for the moment, I need just a bit more time to decorate.”

“You barricaded me… what?” Todd scrambled out of bed and tried the door. True to Dirk’s word, it wouldn’t budge. “DIRK!”

“JUST GO BACK TO SLEEP!” Dirk said with audible exasperation.

“You can’t just…” Todd said, pounding on the door. “I NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM!” He shouted.

“Oh you can wait a minute!!” Dirk shouted back.

Todd shook the door ineffectually for another minute before sitting grumpily back down on the bed. Fine, this was… fine.

Nearly 30 minutes later, Dirk removed the planks which he had use to pin Todd’s door shut and opened it with a flourish. Todd, for all Dirk could tell, had just been standing inches away from the door with his arms crossed and an expression of pure hatred for that whole time.

“Merry Christmas!” Dirk gestured broadly to the whole rest of the house. Todd really wanted to stay angry, but his jaw dropped at the sight.

Floor to ceiling, Dirk had strung up yard upon yard of white, red, and green lights. Paper snowflakes both dangled on delicate strings and lay scattered on tables. Christmassy figurines sat on any flat surface upon which they could fit. Dirk pressed a button on his phone and Ella Fitzgerald’s “Ella Wishes You a Swinging Christmas” began to play.

“H-how?” Todd asked, dazzled. He didn’t recognize half of the decorations, although some of them Dirk had clearly found in Amanda’s decoration box in the garage. Some arts and crafts projects he had created as a child were strewn around various places. 

Dirk stood next to him, hands clasped, waiting for his friend’s approval.

Todd made eye contact with him for a second, let out a long suffering sigh, and then went down the hallway to the restroom. 

“What do you think!?!?!” Dirk followed him down the hallway like a puppy.

Todd cracked the door open and glanced up at him.

“It’s very nice, Dirk.” He said, with a little smile. After he shut the door Dirk allowed himself a private victory dance.

Farah was at her brother’s for Christmas. The anxiety of having to spend time with her family after the death of her father had wound her up even more tightly than usual the past few weeks. Todd and Dirk had offered to go with her for moral support but she had laughed directly into their faces at the suggestion.

Amanda, similarly, had turned down Todd’s invitation to visit as she and the Rowdy Three were right in the middle of some sort of rowdy investigation and none of them could be bothered with something silly like a holiday.

Which had left Dirk and Todd pretty much on their own. Todd had figured it would be a pretty quiet Christmas, until he discovered Dirk’s almost pathological enthusiasm for the holiday. They’d done most of the prep together, grocery shopping, picking out the Christmas tree, baking cookies, and so on. 

On Christmas morning Dirk and Todd ended up sitting next to one another on the couch, Dirk wearing a little paper holiday crown from a Christmas Cracker and red and green plaid pajamas, and Todd wearing an old “Merry Christmas” T-shirt he’d gotten for donating blood and gray sweatpants. They sipped coffee and admired the spectacularly decorated Christmas tree.

“You uh, ready for presents?” Todd asked, glancing up at Dirk with a slight hint of nerves.

Dirk did his best to restrain his excitement, but he couldn’t hide a wide grin and an enthusiastic nod.

Todd retrieved a small, sort of clumsily wrapped gift from under the tree and handed it to Dirk. 

“I hope you like it. I mean, it’s not like a big deal or anything.” Todd muttered, but the way he glanced back and forth between the package and Dirk revealed a bit of anxiety.

Dirk unwrapped the gift with the enthusiasm of a toddler who was 100% positive that their present had come from the North Pole. 

It was a mix cd, identified as such in Todd’s somewhat messy handwriting and accompanied by a long and annotated track list. 

“It’s kind of a silly tradition, but like, Amanda and I make eachother a mix cd every Christmas.” Todd said, blushing a little bit. “I think I made her her first one when she was 2. It wasn’t very good, I was WAY into grunge back then, some of the songs kinda scared her.” 

Dirk stared at Todd as though he had just handed him the single release Wu Tang Clan issue of Once Upon a Time in Shaolin. He held the cd close to his chest.

“Y-you… you let me into a family tradition?” Dirk asked.

“It’s not a big deal, I mean, I didn’t spend any money on it…” Todd sort of muttered.

“I love it. It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” Dirk said. “Can I listen to it right now? What’s playing? Christmas carols!? Stupid, stupid, overplayed Christmas carols. Let’s put this on!”

“No, Dirk.” Todd kind of laughed. “No, I’d get embarrassed.” 

“Never be embarrassed Todd, I love it, it’s amazing, I feel embarrassed for my present after receiving this.” Dirk’s eyes widened and he let out a telenovela level dramatic gasp. “Oh my God, Todd, does this have Mexican Funeral on it?” 

“Just, uh, just one track.” Todd blushed again. “We kinda sucked, I wouldn’t make you suffer through a whole album.” Todd noticed something odd about his friend at that point, and squinted to make sure he understood what was happening. “Holy shit Dirk, are you… are you crying?” 

“It’s fine, it’s nothing.” Dirk shook his head in embarrassment.

Todd bit his lip. There had been something on his mind the whole week leading up to this.

“Dirk, have you ever got a Christmas present before?”

“I mean, technically yes.” Dirk admitted.

“Oh thank God, I wasn’t sure, and I thought if your first ever Christmas gift was some crummy mix cd then I was really letting you down.” Todd said with a laugh of relief.

“But this is the first time I’ve got a gift that was really… That I wanted. From someone who I care about.” Dirk said, careful with his choice of words.

Todd, very tentatively, took Dirk’s hand.

“I care about you too, Dirk.” He said with a smile. For a long moment, the two of them stared at one another. The Christmas carols continued to play, the lights glowed cheerfully on the tree, the house still smelled like the egg-nog french toast Todd had whipped up, and all was right with the world. 

“I bought you a Fender Stratocaster electric guitar.” Dirk said very quickly.

Todd’s contented smile dropped for a moment.

“Wait, what?” Todd asked, shaking his head.

“The guitar. Because you told me you liked the way they sound.”

“That… Dirk, that must have cost you like…”

“Oh don’t worry about it.” Dirk said.

“Like a THOUSAND…”

Before Todd could protest about how unequal a mix cd was to a Fender Stratocaster, Dirk Gently kissed Todd very determinedly right on the mouth. Todd almost protested, but, as he had learned to do in Dirk Gently situations, he figured he might as well just roll with it. He leaned into the kiss and stroked the side of Dirk’s face.

He’d been thinking about doing this for some time.

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas or happy whatever you celebrate!!!


End file.
